The G-Word
Hey friends,
It was a full day at The Stoa. After my state-changing podcast conversation with Stephen Jenkinson (listen here), we had Zak Stein, Adam Robberts, and Collin Morris do sessions in The Stoa. Videos for Zaks and Adams talk will be posted tomorrow.
Tomorrow’s sessions:
Alongsidedness w/ Richard Bartlett. April 3rd @ 12:00 PM ET. Learn more. RSVP here.
The COVID Trolley w/ Patrick Ryan. April 3rd @ 6:30 PM ET. Learn more. RSVP here.
***
April 2, 2020
When I was corresponding with Jordan Hall about fostering the right kind of relationship with both my daemon and with the SOCI that is emerging at The Stoa, he advised me to create a relationship between my daemon and the SOCI’s daemon. I really like that idea. I think the first step is for me to get really intimate with my daemon. I don’t want to let it out of my sight this time. I feel deeply drawn to that feeling of wild romantic potential. It’s as if the two of us were new lovers who cannot keep our eyes off each other.
I think what I need to do—and to do in the spirit of festina lente—is to foster the right kind of relationship with reality—or with God, depending on which metaphysics we want to use. I actually prefer the latter word, and I want to stop being shy about using it, despite my impression management concerns with New Atheist types, who are easily triggered when you use the G-word. My Christian Orthodox upbringing, with its panentheistic essence, always gave me the feeling of swimming in something greater than myself. I think you need to be deep in that state to keep your ego in check.
Today, I chatted with three people I have never chatted with before: Stephen Jenkinson, Bonnitta Roy and Zak Stein. All three conversations were lovely. The conversation I had with Stephen was particularly surprising, not only because it put me into a different state of being, but because he brought up, unprompted, my favorite topic: the daemon. It really helped clear up some of my thoughts on this subject. It was like a message from God.
As a side note, though this may be a superficial concern, there’s something I want to deal with Stoically now, in this public forum. I noticed that I kept mispronouncing the word daemon during my talk with Jenkinson. I get annoyed and insecure when I catch myself mispronouncing things. It's possible that I have dyslexia—or maybe it’s just that I never paid attention in school because I was a terribly rebellious student. I notice that I pronounce other words incorrectly as well: library sometimes comes out as liberry, specific sometimes comes out as pacific, etc.
Feeling my way into the insecurity, I realised that I am worried about being judged, especially intellectually. I’ve examined this before, so the emotional saliency is not that high, but it’s still present. Part of me does not want to venture too far into the internet broadcast mode because I’m afraid of torturing the English language in front of people.
But this is an opportunity to practice my Stoicism. My gift to the world is not eloquence—that’s one of Jenkinson’s gifts—and that’s okay. Will people judge me? Yes, some surely will. But the ones who judge harshly are not worth worrying about. It’s the ones who can look past such things who matter. Those are my people. I think I’m called to be more public than I’ve previously been, and that means that I am going to have to risk looking stupid in front of others. How can you be a Stoic if you won’t risk looking stupid?
***
Gift Economy / The Stoa currently operates through a gift economy. We are offering the Stoa as a gift, for people to freely use during these troubled times. If you are inspired to provide a gift to The Stoa, email thestoa at protonmail dot com. Your gift can take the form of money, support, services or ideas. If you wish to gift money, you can do so here or here for ongoing gifts.